Awaken You Wonderful We - Letter to Readers, Parents, Policians, Scientists to save the victims of Autism, ADHD, Depression and Suicide Part 3

The four causes of human problem

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Awaken You Wonderful We - Letter to Readers, Parents, Politicians, Scientists to save the victims of Autism, ADHD, Depression, and Suicide Part 1

Simply Using smartwatch we can know the state of mind, the state of mind, the rhythm of feeling: love, hatred, stress or anxiety. To know the world are HYSTERICALLY STRESSED OR NOT?

New view about autism, depression, ADHD.

 

Thank you, mom and dad, friends, sorry for the pain and hurt that 
you are experiencing.

One thing I know is your child is under stress, extreme stress by themselves or adults unconsciously. We need to understand them.

Stress season of Uinis highest on January: with the soaring of death, and cardiovascular stroke. Maybe they are too stress because enjoying time passed, boring stressful work begin and stressful paying credit cards for the amount that overspend before Holiday, New Year'Eve, and black Fridays. School also make American stress. The number of death reduced substantially during summer vacation, and the number of injury for kids is increased, maybe the kids play more freely than other time. 

One thing to check about the effect of schooling in society: look at the diagram of death rate between America and Europe with Australia and New Zealand. The pattern is so obviously opposite according to the different school schedule and summer vacation.

Best of all

Embrace him with love, connection, free stress environment, and chances of joy, happiness to build his abilities. Stress dominates him that he is out of control. Think of meditation. 

All of these will soothe the overactive or stressed mind. Think of the moment you are under extreme stress, you may react like him, you may hurt other unconsciously. 

The four causes of human problems
Lack of connection	All beings: parents, people, adults, kids, brothers, nature, trees, animals, and natural living environment; technology devices make this lacking worsen.
Lack of love	Unconditional love, unconditional support, and love come from understanding. Most of the love they received are angry love, blind love, ignorant love, greedy love, selfish love, and conditioned love; receiving these love making them more painful and stressful.
Stressful environment	Stress from family: parents, sibling, and adults; school: teachers, friends, subject, and tests; environment: all things they see as the threatening. They do not get enough love, connection, ability and understanding to overcome the mild unwanted problems.
Lack of skill, knowledge, right understanding or ignorance	Lack of essential skills and ability make them left behind. Conditioned love, lack of connection and many threatening make them do not feel safe enough to learn more, do more, try more, ask more and play more to gain real powers, strength, and abilities. They misunderstand many essential things, and conflicts in human society as threatening. They are not understood by adults that they real things they need is unconditional love, connection, close contact, and supportive environment to feel safe to gain essential skills to understand and deal well with the problems they meet.

The best combination of love, connection, and good understanding creates individual’s ability. Love, connection, and understanding of environment create inspiration, motivation, and safety for children to learn more, do more and risk more. These lead to strong abilities of the children. The best combination of love, connection, and understanding helps ordinary children become geniuses; and help them achieve far more success in life than ordinary people can imagine. On the other hand, the worst combination may create the pain, fear, sadness, disappointment, hurt, wound, depression, and anxiety to the children. The smart children may affect extremely stressed if they live under the worst combination of these four factors. The lack of love, lack of connection, lack of understanding, stressful problems, and stressed state of mind interact with each other form a circle of cause and effect or a dot of cause and effect. Gradually, countless vicious circles are formed. The connection of these circles creates the downward spiral or downward life. The circle of cause and effect leave mark on thought, belief, brain structure, emotional life, spiritual life, cognitive thinking, gene, physical body, metabolism, skills, talent, ability, cognitive behaviors, and habits of the children. Gradually, children may affect some mental diseases, social problems, health problems, and bad characters.

On the bright side, we live in the society where there are talented people, genius, the saints, great men, and successful people; all of them grew up with naked small children. On the contrary, there also are the criminals, the slaughters, the poor, the disabled, the ill, and many miserable people in our society; all of them also grew up from naked small children. Some people are the sufferers of living environment; in other words, they are the creators of their destiny.

What is the best combination of these four factors, what is the worst combination of these four factors? There is no exact answer, the combination is not only the science of achievement but also is the art of living well. Parents and leaders have to use the head and the heart to get the understanding; then they need to use the head and heart in serving and using the art of reward and punishment.

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more, and become more, you are a leader.” John Quincy Adams

I will prove the assumption in table fourteen “The four main causes cause most of the problems” by the theory and the knowledge that I know. I hope that researchers and statisticians will quantify these causes, and carry out the treatment to the needed people.

First, I will use the mental disorders with the known symptoms of the disorders but do not fully know the causes. The mental disorder is increasing substantially in our modern society. Most concerns are autism, depression, and ADHD happening to many healthy children without any previous indicators. Especially, the autism causes most of the worry in parents. Even worse, these problems happening to small children seem out of control, it creates stress and worries for many parents. I chose autism as an example because autism has some characters that are not understandable for the researchers, physicians, and scientists. On the other hand, the autistic characters easily explained by the assumption of four causes in table eight.

I AM SORRY VICTIMS, WE ARE WRONG.

The signs of Autism, from National Autism Association with my explanation in brackets and italics.

Autism is a neurodevelopmental disorder characterized by:

·         Social impairments (“Lack of interacting skill or social skill, these skill need a lot of effort to study and master”).

·         Cognitive impairments (“Lack of cognitive thinking, this skill is very hard to form and master”)

·         Communication difficulties (“How hard if you have to learn a new language or to live in a new country where there is only has danger? It is harder for the autistic children to learn to speak and read other emotion if the children have no joy or no safety in learning”)

·         Repetitive behaviors (“The signs of the children have very little skill or learn just a few behaviors, they tend to repeat a few behaviors they learned”)

Early Signs:

A person with ASD (Autism spectrum disorder) might:

·         Not respond to their name (“They do not have much impressed with their name, they do not have the feeling of joy or happiness when hearing their name”).

·         Not point at objects or things of interest (“Lack of interest in things. What is your interested when you are fearful, tired and stressed”)

·         Not play “pretend” games (“This game need a lot of cognitive thinking and imaginative thinking, the ability belong to emotional thinking. How hard to play pretend game with police officers, technical engineers or serious people? How easy to play pretend game with healthy children - the ones who have high imaginative mind, irrational thinking, and little of prejudices?”)

·         Avoid eye contact (“Autistic children do not know to read information from the eye as normal children do”)

·         Want to be alone (“Lack of all vital social skills so the best way is to stay away from crowd. They have suffered enough how painful when they contact with other. Sadly, this pain may come from the beloved ones”)

·         Have difficulty understanding or showing understanding, or other people’s feelings or their own. (“Autistic children lack the emotional intelligence so that they lack understand other and understand themselves”)

·         Have no speech or delayed speech (“How hard for children to learn to talk? Lack of love, connection, understanding, and a lot of stressful problems make children afraid to learn to talk. The slower start of speech makes them more stressed than healthy children also”)

·         Repeat words or phrases over and over (“It is very hard to learn, so when they learn anything, especially learning with joy, they tend to repeat that words: let observe the emotion or feeling when the autistic children repeating words”)

·         Give unrelated answers to questions. (“They do not have the cognitive thinking or intelligence to understand the questions and words of questions. They may give unrelated answers. Unfortunately, if autistic children get pain from answering, they may be so much more fearful with the learning that they choose to withdraw from learning”)

·         Get upset by minor changes. (“Living under the constant stressed state caused by living environment, they will be in response or upset with minor changes: minor changes can stimulate the fight or flight in autistic children. You can understand this when you are stressed or angry because of fear, overwork or in the stressful situation. How much love, connection, and understanding you need from your beloved ones?”)

·         Have obsessive interests. (“Autistic children only know very little things, like or love very little things, and these things may bring joy for them. So that they may obsessive with these interests.”)

·         Flap their hands, rock their body or spin in circles. (“Perhaps they learn these behaviors by mimic the behaviors of characters in the shows on television”)

·         Have unusual reactions (over or under-sensitivity) to the way things sound, smell, taste, look or feel. (“The things with sound, smell, taste, look or feel may have some similarity with the stressed situation they have suffered. The familiar sound, smell, taste, look, and feel may appear in the situation that caused negative events in their family. Their unusual reactions are just the conditioned responses”)

·         Have low to no social skills (“Social skills are the hard skills learned from the environment. The autistic children are so much stressed that they learn very little or no social skills, on the other hand, the healthy children have enough joy, love, and connection to learning these social skills”).

·         Avoid or resist physical contact (“Physical contact creates many emotional signals; they will avoid and resist if they do not feel joyful, happy, and peaceful with physical contact. Quick-tempered parents usually make their children do not feel safe with any of their behaviors. Unfortunately, if they do not get enough physical contact, they may be indifference with other people”).

·         Demonstrate little safety or danger awareness. (“The show of lacking abilities”)

·         Reverse pronouns (e.g., says “you” instead of “I”)

People with autism may also:

·         Have unusual interests and behaviors. (“This is because of lacking skills and poor learning abilities”)

·         Have extreme anxiety and phobias, as well as unusual phobias (“Any normal things in the living environment that created or related with their previous the stressed state will become their phobias. New Office workers may fear many things during their first day at work; they may have a lot of phobias. Experienced workers are less fearful than new workers are. Phobias come from not understand, misunderstand or previous experience”)

· Lineup toys or other objects. (“Perhaps this is the mark of logical intelligence and spatial intelligence the autistic boys have”).

·         Play with toys the same way every time. (“They learn only a few ways to play with toys”)

·         Like parts of objects (e.g., wheels)

·         Become upset by minor changes. (“Minor changes can be interpreted into big threats with stressed people”).

Other Symptoms:

·         Hyperactivity (“A way of reducing stress that they suffered in unusual ways; Moreover, constant acting help release enormous energy in small children”)

·         Impulsivity (“Acting without thinking, they lack emotional intelligence, lack of compassion so that when they are irritating, they usually act with little thinking”)

·         Short attention span (“The stressed state in mind and stress chemicals in body make them lack of concentration.”)

·         Aggression (“Another word of expressing the overreact of hurting people”)

·         Cause self-injury. (“To some extent, the self-injury activities may help them relief with pain in their brain and body. Who likes tattooing? Who like hurting themselves and others? Do you have any experience that you are so stressed that you want to hurt yourself?”)

·         Meltdowns (“The tension in mind, thinking, and brain will lead to exhaustion very quickly”)

·         Unusual eating and sleeping habits (“Eating and sleeping are affected by the feeling they have. Unusual feelings lead to unusual eating and unusual sleeping habits. Autistic children normally eat in fear, eat in sorrow and sleep with fear”)

·         Unusual mood or emotional reactions (“This is the results from stress and hurt that they have suffered”)

·         Lack of fear or more fear than expected. (“This comes from lack of understanding of the environment.”)

When I read these symptoms of autism, I got a chill. I visualized that these autistic kids had been gone through serious stress. Moreover, they are still being so stressful that they upset by minor changes. Observers can easily see and feel the stressed state through their actions, their reactions to the environment, and their reactions to stimulations of the environment. They can sense the stress chemicals available to autistic children. The effects of adrenaline, norepinephrine, and cortisone in table three: “the most symptoms of stress that we can find in many patients” may found in every autistic child.

Scientific of early signs:

Table 2: Side effects of three stress chemicals

Side effects of three chemicals creating stress
Adrenalin	Norepinephrine	Less serious side effectsCortisol	Serious side effects cortisol
Sweating	Pain, burning	Acne, dry skin, or thinning skin	Vision problems
Nausea and vomiting	Numbness, weakness, or cold	Bruising or discoloration of skin	Swelling
Pale skin	Slow or uneven heart rate	Insomnia	Rapid weight gain
Feeling short of breath	Trouble breathing	Mood changes	Shortness of breath
Dizziness	Vision, speech, or balance difficulties	Increased sweating	Severe depression or unusual thoughts or behaviors
Weakness or tremors	Blue lips or fingernails	Headache	Seizures
Headache	Spotted skin	Dizziness	Bloody or tarry stools
Feeling of nervousness or anxiousness		Nausea, stomach pain	Coughing up blood
High blood pressure symptoms: a severe headache, blurred vision, buzzing in your ears, anxiety, confusion, chest pain, shortness of breath, uneven heartbeat, seizure			Symptoms of pancreatitis: pain in your upper stomach that spreads to your back; nausea and vomiting; or fast heart rate
			Low potassium
			Dangerously high blood pressure

People who are under stress always have symptoms inside the body described in table two: side effects of three chemicals creating stress, this also the signs of Gut Feeling. If people usually have high levels of the stress chemicals, they will have the symptoms or diseases caused by short-term stress and long-term stress, they will have the stress symptoms in physical health and mental health. Reading the table two, ordinary people can understand the symptoms of stress explained by physicians and therapists in medical books or medical websites.

In everyday activities, people may get the signs of short-term. The short-term stress can affect your body in any way, some of them include:

Table 3: bad effects of short-term stress on body, mind, and performance

The physical symptoms of short-term stress

1.  Making heartbeat faster, this may lead to increase blood pressure in short term.

2.  Making breath faster

3.  Making sweat more

4.  Leaving with cold hands, feet, or pale skin

5.  Making feel sick to your stomach

6.  Making feel sick to your stomach

7.  Tightening muscles or feel tense

8.  Dry mouth

9.  Intestine problems

10.    Increasing muscle spasms, headaches, and fatigue

11.    Shortness of breath

Bad effects on mind and performance of short-term stress

1.  Interfering with judgment and causing to make bad decisions

2.  Reducing the ability of logical thinking

3.  Act irrationally and emotionally; easily fall to irrational thinking and irrational behaving.

4.  Seeing normal situations as threatening

5.  Reducing enjoyment in many activities, unable to laugh at funny things

6.  Negative feelings: anxious, frustrated, or mad

7.  Awake during sleep, nightmare or screaming during sleep with children

8.  Loss of apatite

9.  Making it difficult to concentrate to solve the problems and often have the distraction.

10.   Feel of rejected by a group.

11.   Afraid of free time, time to stay alone; like to spend time do many useless activities or kill time

12.   Irritate inside

13.   Unable to work, and not willing to discuss their problems with others

I want to find out what are the real causes of autism, I cannot satisfy with the presumed causes by some researchers: A genetic basis to autism, environmental pollution, or the Valproic acid - a medicine for seizures. If one of these causes is true, they can create the autistic mice in the laboratory. In fact, mice with autism have not yet successfully created; some researchers believe that the mice injected with Valproic acid have some autistic symptoms are not autistic mice. Moreover, if one of the above causes is true, so how can we explain the ratio between the numbers of autistic boys and autistic girls. Most of the living areas of autistic children are in cities, the very rare case of autistic children in the countryside, or rural areas. The fact there is all the above assumptions are wrong because these assumptions fail to prove the character of autism.

I think the real causes must belong to the lifestyle of family members (love), the caring for autistic children (connection), the energy in their families (peace - stress) and the ability of children; these are the four causes combine each other and create the effects on children.

The first health problem individuals possibly affect at the early stage of life is autism. If the infants’ needs of connection and love are not satisfied, the infants may become irritation, anger, and stress. Even worse, the stressful atmosphere in their family caused by parents can make the stress of children more severe. Close observation can easily realize the stressful atmosphere in the families of autistic children. Their parents may be stressful with work, society, financial problem; lack of love and support from the partner or tired with the boring partner. Parents become stressed, make a lot of crying, a lot of blame, a lot of fucking, shouting; a lot of ruling of “have to”, a lot of contempt signals. Many parents also get the symptoms of stress in table three: the most symptoms of stress that we can find in many patients. One of my vivid moments was about my first child three months ago, in the morning, he woke up, making some fun activities, but when he saw my wife suffering pain because of scram in her leg, he nearly burst into a tear. We had to hug him and calm him down. This has triggered in me with the thinking of what happening with children in a stressful family. I have read a lot of many mothers got depression after giving birth. The depression of the mothers comes from the stressful atmosphere in families that many readers and people have seen. How about the small children and the infants in those families, what suffering they have to bear; finding out the effects of stressful environment on small children are my main concerns. Some people in Vietnam said that the mother and father with over 30 or 35 years old are too old for giving birth and their children may get the defects and problems. This is just the people’s assumption because the Westerners do not think that and they do not find the scientific proof for the assumption. After searching I found out that the habits, thinking, lifestyle, and emotion of the parents over 35 years old are too rigid, too tidy, too boring and too stressful for the forming and developing of fetus and children. The main concerns for the development of the children are the lifestyle and energy of living environment, it is not the number of years old of parents.

Lacking love, lacking connection combining with the endless stress can create the health problems in young kids. Depending on the varieties of stressful environment, of lacking love, of lacking connection, the infants can get the different degree of stressed state. The fact is the effects of stress on the physical ability and mental ability of children varies so much that scientists have to use the term of Autism spectrum disorders (ASD) to describe the variety of autism.

Children affect which symptoms in the list of symptoms depend on the degree of stress that they have to suffer from the environment. The ability of individual depends on the stage of life, gender, characters, the instinct, strengths, and weaknesses. The ability of individuals, the lack of love, the lack of connection, the degree of the stressful environment and the intervention of physicians will determine the variety of the autistic symptoms. The above combination varies so much that the symptoms and progression of autistic children have so many varieties, scientists have to use Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) to describe autism.

The basic symptoms of autism, illustrated by the table below, are often accompanied by other medical conditions. These symptoms are the results of the constant stressed state that the autistic children have suffered. The varieties of each symptom depend on the environment and the abilities of children. Each specific group of symptoms with the right degree can create a specific definition of illness in medical care.

Table 15: Basic symptoms of autism accompanied by other medical conditions

Core autism symptoms	Associated neurological issues	Associated systemic issues	Related disorders
Social deficits	Sleep deficits	Immune dysfunction	Sleep disorders
Language impairment	Mood disorders	GI disorders	Mood disorders
Repetitive behaviors	Anxiety		Anxiety disorders
	Hyperactivities		Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder
	Lack of attention		Obsessive compulsive disorder
	Seizures

                             Sources: www.autismspeaks.org/what-autism/symptoms

The autism and other health problems in young boys and young girls are the serious side effects of excessive stress chemicals; these excessive stress chemicals come from the bearing of extreme stress in life.

Infants and kids are afraid of big noises, aggressive environment, beating, shouting, unsafe environment. Most of all they are afraid of the beating, comparing with others by their angry parents. They are afraid of the activities that harm the six needs of human beings. They are so weak and fragile that they need love, connection, peaceful environment to grow. Unfortunately, in modern society, there are plenty of technology devices, which attract the attention of children and family members; it means that these devices take away the connection and love of small children. Parents lost a large amount of time to connect with their children and other members. Children do not get enough love and connection they feel uncomfortable with some symptoms of stress. If not handle well, they may be stressed and make some bad behaviors like crying, shouting, and screaming. Making bad behaviors, children may receive back the anger of their parents and adults; which may make children more hurting and stressed. Their discomfort makes their unconscious mind misinterprets many unsatisfied things as threatens from the environment. It activates the stress system in children’s bodies. Each time of stress, a few stress hormones pumped into the body and brain by themselves. If stress continues, it compounds into severe stress with many complications. 

The complication at first few years of life is autism; autistic children often have the stomach problem, which is the result of stress chemicals described in table three. Stomach disease usually occurs when people are worried, anxious and stressed. In the hospital, experienced doctors often prescribe the psychotic medications with gastric medication for patients with acute stomach ulcer after some severe incidence. Patients with serious trauma in the hospital usually prescribed the gastric medication to protect stomach because the stress from trauma may upset the stomach. In fact, people experienced serious stress usually got acute gastroenteritis. Worry and stress are some of the main factors cause stomach pain or intestine problems. The autistic children usually have digestive problems is the proof that autistic children have been experiencing the severe stress.

Why the autistic children have been gone through severe stress? During infant time, children are soft and weak. They need the love and connection of parents to feel protected, safe and happy. Children are extremely afraid of their parents to abandon them. Scientists have done a study to show how much love, how much connection animals need. In the documental film: “Emotional intelligence” of Daniel Gilbert has a short video to record this test. Researchers confined a baby monkey in a separate cage, left him very hungry. When the door of cage opened to free the baby monkey to run in a room, where there are milk and a sample model of mother monkey. The model of mother monkey and the bottle of milk were parallel, separated by a panel. The little monkey rushed to the model of mother monkey; he twisted, hugged and played joyfully with the monkey model even he was very hungry. This video set a deep impression on me about the obsessed need of love and connection that small babies need. It creates a chill in me when I hear or see some parents punish their children crucially. The crucial punishment may relieve the anger for parents and make the children so afraid to obey the orders, but crucial punishment also leaves a big scar on children’s soul. Their ignorance and ego of parents are so big enough that parents do not know they are creating bad karma for their children and society.

In some distressful families, parents always argue, blame, and shout at each other. They do not make enough love action, they do not care much for others to satisfy each other’s needs. Parents’ basic needs are not satisfied, it creates stress in the family. This is the beginning of tragedy to their small children. To some extent, the financial situation makes them worried, along with lack of love, lack of support and lack of connection that make parents sad, angry and anxious. If the sadness, anger, and worry are not calmed down, parents may get severe stress. Some mothers even get depressed after giving birth. Because of being busy at work, spending time with technology equipment, parents spend very little time with their infants. This time is not enough to satisfy the need for love and connection of the infants. Even worse, not only lacking the number of time parents spend with their children, but also is the quality of time they spend with their children is terrible. They hug their children in anger, sadness and contempt mood. Even worse, there are some breastfeeding mothers feed the child while they are sad and crying because of the stress and loneliness. These sources milk is poisonous for their children’s physical and mental development. The infants lack love and live in the stressful environment with big noise, big cursing, big cry, less of hugging and kissing, lack of talking face to face. The subconscious of children is alerted and sensible to detect the unwanted things and threatening signals. Moreover, they are too weak, too fragile; they do not have the ability and receive enough support to calm the arousing mind. These lead to over stimulate the mind, create an extremely stressed state, even worse, some children fall into seizures and panic state at the early stage of life. Full of chemical stress circulate around the young bodies. Repeated many times, children may be conditioned the stress responses to the environment. After conditioning, children easily become stress as the responses to mild stimulations.

Some watchful mothers can read these early abnormal signs. Children may have the early symptoms of overload adrenalin and norepinephrine and cortisone-like sweating, nausea and vomiting, crying, pale skin, feeling shortness of breath, dizziness, weakness or tremors, headache, feeling nervous or anxious, a lot of crying, screaming, and sudden awake at night. These are the signs of stressed children. These symptoms may have long before the symptoms of autism. These symptoms listed in table three: the most symptoms of stress that we can find in many patients. The children start to cry a lot and or have some abnormal actions. If parents can intervene in time, they can save their children. They can calm the children with their love by hugs, time of contact, time of talking, and with a peaceful state of their mind.

Autistic children do not have the ability read the emotional signals, so they misinterpret and cannot understand well with the emotional signals they receive. To join in community, the most important skill is reading and understanding the thinking and feelings of opposite people by the emotional signals. Lack of connection and lack of love at the early stage of life, autistic children do not understand these signals and tend to afraid of these signals. People usually afraid of or overreact to things they do not understand.

“In this world, there is always danger for those who are afraid of it”.

George Bernard Shaw

Autistic children are not able to interact and understand the other person’s ideas. It means they lack emotion intelligence. Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand human emotions, which formed in the early stage of human life. The infants have the premature brain, the brain is in process of developing to mature brain during several first years of their life. Children crave for human affection, love, and human connection to feel protected, safe and happy. The happy state during the early childhood is the best condition for the perfection of the immature brain. On the other hand, stress state during early childhood is the worst condition for the perfection of the immature brain. It is very dangerous if bad thing interferes with the perfection of the immature brain. The bad intervention can leave the defect in brain structures and brain functions.

The role of connection and love to the development of newborn baby may found in the living of children in orphanages. During earlier stages of life in the orphanage, the infant babies have cared well; they have enough the support for physical development. Children in orphanages do not have to live in the stressful environment like autistic babies. Unfortunately, they do have enough love and do not have enough connection with the human being to form social skills in critical time. The lack of love and connection can abnormalities to the orphans’ mind and brain and create a little stress on them. The effects of abnormalities and mild stress are obvious after they adopted by their parents; some adopted children have a lot of difficulties to join in communities, new family, and classes. These adopted children lack the critical skills to survive in human society. Joining in everyday activities in society is much easy with normal children, but it is very difficult and stressful with children from orphanages. At the early stage of life, children in orphanages lack love and connection with human being in the most important period of developing of the brain. The lack of love and connection during the development of the brain leads to the lacking of vital social skills. To some extent, the autistic children also lack these vital social skills as the children in orphanages because they lack love, lack of connection, lack of vital skills and living in the stressful environment. Fortunately, the children in orphanages do not have to live in the stressful environment like autistic children, so that they have different problems with the autistic children.

Why these autistic children lack social skills but some autistic children have good abilities of logic and learning other skills. Most Autistic children like to look at cubic things and moving objects. They do not pay much attention to the emotion signals from faces and eyes of people. Perhaps they lack emotional skill; they are not good at emotional intelligence so that they cannot understand the importance of eyes and faces in expressing information. Lacking ability to understand messages, emotions, or feelings in people’s eyes and faces make them not interested seeing it. Not seeing the face makes them miss many chances of learning, interacting to improve emotional intelligence. To a human being, interaction skill is the most important skill for good living in the human society where people mainly communicate with emotional signals. Lacking social skill, autistic children find it is hard to integrate into the community. Early first signs, the children are indifferent, not concentrated, slow language and aggression, making strange behaviors, doing things unnaturally. These are the indicators that the children are under stress and have emotional disorders. Autistic children cannot read other people's emotions in the environment so they are afraid of interacting with people. They chose to stay away from the crowd to protect them from the harm.

Most autistic children are in the cities, in industrial zones, rarely in rural villages. Because in cities autistic children have less time of connecting with nature and other human beings, less time of playing freely, less time to play with other kids than the children live in rural areas. They only play with toys, televisions, phones in artificial spaces, these things only make interested for short time. These spaces have no vitality, no energy, no fun and nothing that stimulates and creates curiosity in children. The young children need the space of living, which is funny, freely, naturally and rich in energy to create more energy in children. The energy of children and environment exchanges in many ways we do not know. Therefore, there is little energy in artificial places of living. You see how tasteless when watching artificial flowers with closed, clean spaces versus how joyful for children plant a rose in the garden, watering it and watch its growing with blooming flowers. The difference between the energy in the countryside and the energy in the home of autistic children may be same as the difference between the energy in kindergarten and the energy with nursing homes. I have worked with two Singaporean doctors; they made me rethink about the role of natural environment. One doctor shows very interested in a mantis in his flowers pot; he took a lot of pictures of the mantis and post on his facebook with excitement. I am very astonished by his works because, in the countryside of Vietnam, we see a lot of mantises on the trees. The other Singaporean doctor told that he is very like to live in Vietnam because after working hours, he can go to see hundreds of ducks swimming, birds singing, cows and buffalos on fields. You can sense that energy of joy by seeing the happiness in the eyes and actions of children; as a father, just seeing or remembering these kinds of actions of my child help me understand how important to give space for the children to playing freely with full energy. 

If kids are not satisfied their deep need and have to live with the boring environment, they gradually lose interest, lack of vital skills and dull their instinct. Lacking energy from environment make kids uncomfortable, lose the interest in things, in life, lose the enthusiasm to read environment, do not feel happy, and do not feel energetic in living; they become indifferent with life. These are the signs of losing the vital fuel of life, lacking the active energy. If paying attention to the behaviors, the emotions and the reactions of the children, parents can have the better understanding of their children, their energy, and emotions they have. If there are any abnormities in the behaviors and emotions of children, parents need to solve those abnormities as soon as possible. Parents should care for the fluidity and the natural manner in behaviors of young children; even parents should try hard to encourage their children to speak funny words, silly words, playing freely. Most importantly is making children smile; parents should make stressed children smile as much as possible. Because smiling is in action shows that children feel safe, secured, protected and extremely joyful. Parents should take precaution to unnatural signals every time like rigidity and stiffness in actions, lack of emotion in actions, lack of energy and enthusiasm in playing of young children; these signals are against nature, it means that children may feel unsafe. Parents have to get the real understanding and make their children feel safe.

In the rigid environment, children’s needs are not satisfied, they may feel uncomfortable; their unconscious mind activates the chemical of stress in case of need for their safety. Live in closed, rigid environment, children may lose all chances of forming some vital skills to deal with problems in real life, especially in the stressful situation. Small children in the countryside are more likely to play with nature, to play with one another, with friends of the same age; they have tremendous opportunities to learn, think, negotiate, play, and interact with other human beings; these activities sharpen their vital social skills. Gradually, owning for the supportive environment children can increase their intelligence; the intelligence may be the combination of emotional intelligent (EQ), adaptive intelligent (AQ), spiritual intelligence (SQ), social intelligence (SQ), and intelligent quotient (IQ). In my opinions, if the environment supports well for the children, they can develop these multiple intelligences astonishingly. Children in rural areas can gain some good skills from playing in nature that helps them adapt well to the changes and pressures from the environment. The disadvantage of children in rural areas is the lack of good education, lack of time and resources for studying. To some extent, the difference of the living environments has helped the children in rural areas overcome the family stress better than autistic children in the city.

“Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.”

                                                                             Albert Einstein

Continue:

Awaken You Wonderful We - Letter to Readers, Parents, Politicians, Scientists to save the victims of Autism, ADHD, Depression and Suicide Part 4

Citation:

Van Duy Dao. Awaken you wonderful we. Amazon. (2017) Awakenyouwonderfulwe.com

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